Heard outside my door (earlier):

Male: "Am I the drunkest bastard on campus?"
Female: "Have you thrown up? Are you going to throw up again?"

Male: "There are 14 of us, but we drank 16 bottles of Chardonnay."

And later...

Paramedic: "Get up. If you're a big enough girl to get drunk, you're a big enough girl to get up".

Yes, that's right, a paramedic. After I heard the first quotes, I put my earphones on and continued to work on my Spanish paper. (Again, I went out earlier. I promise, I'm not a complete hermit.) Sometime between then and now, the group of people outside my door realized that one of their friends was only semi-conscious, and would only open her eyes or show signs of life every so often if they shouted her name loudly. They called security, who called the paramedics. The paramedic reminded the semi-conscious girl's friend (who was accompanying them to the hospital) to bring shoes and a jacket for when the girl would be able to come back to campus. So that means she should be okay.

But really, I can't imagine drinking so much that I literally pass out. That my blood is filled with so much poison that only my basic bodily functions can continue, but nothing else. I suppose if you consume enough alcohol quickly enough, you get to that point without realizing it is coming. But still. Scary.

I'm not against drinking. But drinking to that extent is just stupid. (And this girl was not a tiny girl. She's tall and not super-skinny, I'd say about 150 pounds or so, so it's not like a couple drinks got her to this point. She has to have drank a lot of alcohol to get to the point where she passed out.)